my sister…

for eating disorder awareness week.

This feels weird cos i usually blog about me and my sister asked me to write this about her eating disorder – so i am going to try to say how it felt being around IT.

First of all i Looooove my sister. She is 22. She is in college. she lives in Belfast. She is funny. She can sometimes be grumpy but she is not as bad as she used to be!

When she was younger and in secondary school, she was bullied on social media website (which is why I am reluctant to use Facebook and that’s why i like mam minding my blog).

She was being called fat and ugly by  a couple of horrible people and she wasn’t at all !and then she began to worry and couldn’t deal with it. Before we knew it she had anorexia.

it is 8 years this year since Cora got anorexia. At that time i was 5 and my brother was only 3.. Its hard to remember the beginning cos i was so small. The first bit i really remember was when Cora had to go into hospital.

I remember frequently visiting the hospital and visiting Cora there. Mummy stayed there as well. I didn’t know what was wrong with Cora and I didn’t ask. I was afraid she was going to die cos nobody said what was wrong. So mam and dad had to try and explain a bit. We made this video one day when dad was bringing us to school and she was in the hospital. I look sad. But we wanted her back.

When she came home from hospital meal times were horrible. Mam and dad had told us that she had an illness. That she wasn’t able to control and get better from and the told us it wasn’t her fault.

but dinner times were hard:

  • she had to be last to the table
  • she had to eat on a certain dish
  • she kept shouting at us
  • she was very angry
  • she kept reheating her food.
  • she kept cutting food into tiny pieces.
  • we had to “keep our heads down”

She was so bony and she was always freezing cold. She always stood at the heater or against the oven. She wore heaps of clothes. We were scared to comment to her on any of this but sometimes we asked mum and dad.It was always the same…they reminded us it was an illness. She wasn’t really angry even when she seemed it – she was more sad. She hated herself. We had to “keep our heads down”.

She spent most of her time out of our house. I don’t think she wanted to be here. To be honest i don’t want to hurt her feelings, but it felt a lot more SAFE when she wasn’t here! i tried to keep out of her way as much as possible cos it was scary. My wee brother tried so hard to fix her and he couldn’t and he found it very hard.

She ate fruit all the time. …pink lady apples!

She always was so angry with mam and dad  even though they said she was just angry and sad with herself.before

When she went to college we knew by that stage that she wasn’t JUST our sister…she was 100% anorexia at times…Cora at times..and a bit of both at times…you knew she was herself when she was happy, nice, happy to see us. We knew when she was angry to stay away and not get involved.

Cora tried really HARD to get better and  and she eats normally now.

  • She is recovering.
  • My younger brother Caoilte used to say which percent was her and which was the Anorexia, cos it helped him figure out. now we don’t need to do that!
  • She is a LOT happier now.
  • She isn’t anorexic now. She can be a control freak LOL…but i just be a turtle (and pull my head back in!)
  • She is much happier, she likes herself now
  • She loves coming home now.
  • She gets angry at times but it’s DIFFERENT…normal big sister stuff!
  • She is a LOT nicer to be with.
  • She eats crap that i dont like – nuts and humous and lots of weird vegetables that i never even heard of! But that’s just a normal older sis!
  • She watches TV and DVDs with us ….
  • we look forward to her coming home.
  • it is so much better
  • its good to have the old Cora back
  • she cries when she reads my blog.
  • she is ok …..i suppose……LOL (joke Cora)
  • she is a bit like me i guess!….she wishes!

ANOREXIA is a horrible illness. The Person who HAS it is so sad inside. They starve and can die. Lots of them don’t get better.

for me Anorexia can change other peoples lives too. I avoided my sister. I was scared of her. Mum and dad helped me cope. My sister is recovered now…now she is just an ANNOYING OLDER SISTER…and i looooooove her 🙂

Cora i hope this helps you and Debbie to raise awareness of eating disorders and how they feel for smaller brothers.

I love you Cora1531822_793189827374054_243886298_n

from Fionn.

xxxxxxxxxx

PS… look up this link for HELP!  https://www.facebook.com/CAREDNI?fref=ts