We have had to bury 2 of Fionn’s grandparents now, and he has encountered tragic death related to school life. He “feels” grief- but in a completely different way than us “normal”.He goes through the formalities it requires, but to an outsider, he will appear unaffected- he is NOT. Once again, he is different- but not LESS.    mum

i find all deaths very strange.

the emotions for an aspie happen at the time you hear the news.

but then your head tells you that the person, if they were old and sick is now in a much happier place.

i know people look at me and think i am very hard because i am not cying for days and days.

but i really am not.

i am very soft on the inside and i do feel it – but is not easy to explain feelings,


I have not really experienced death much in my life.

i had 2 baby cousins who died when i could not remember.

my granny died before i was born – eeryone thinks i look like her!

my grandad died last year.

that was the first death i really experienced.

i cried for a short while at the time – and i was sad that daddy was an orphan now.

we went to the house

i saw his body but i never touched it.

it wasnt scary but it just my granda to me….so i didnt want to touch it.

all my cousins did different things, and my brothers and sisters.

i did what i felt i needed to .

sometimes i enjoyed the cousins, sometimes we played, sometimes we talked to people and then we had the funeral.

i found it all just strange more than totally sad. and very confusing.

But i really loved grandad

and ihave wee cards with his picture on them and i use them as a book mark

so i never ever will forget him



Some deaths are really strange

and i find them very unsettling.

if they are young people who are really sick i HATE that.

Last yr someone almost my age who i knew a bit committed suicide and i was very upset and i didnt really know how i felt.

i felt confused, cos life is just so good to me.


Last week a really close friend of my mums died.

It was very sad for her and she was out at the house a lot.

i knew the person who dieds family well.

it felt sad because mammy knew her very well

so i was sad cos mum was so upset.


Today i heard about another boy who committed suicide.

for reasons unknown

i didnt really know him but mum and dad told me so i wouldnt get a shock in my school cos he goes there so they will say it tomorrow.

Mum and dad know his family too.

Dad made us promise if we ever were really bullied or sad to make sure to TELL them!

I feel a bit sad, confused, and nervous about what might happen in school tomorrow.

So when i heard i started frantically playing the tin whistle cos i was all mixed up and enxious.

Our emotions are NOT the same as other peoples.

but we DO feel things!